A coaching relationship is much like any other relationship - sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. And regardless of whether the coaching relationship works or not, one constant remain - you get out of it what you put into it.
To the uninitiated, there are a few things you need to know before you hire a coach. It's called "kicking the tires" in the auto industry; you want to see if the coach really is who she (or he) says she (or he) is. In my experience, I have seen not-so-good coaches with great marketing material (web site, face book, etc.) and great coaches who prefer less fanfare. In other words, there is no rhyme or reason how coaches will market themselves, so it's ultimately up to the buyer (you) to find and discern who is right for you.
The following steps will help you prepare to find and hire the perfect coach for you:
1 Know why you want to work with a coach. Sometimes, you may feel stuck; you might be feeling that you need some outside motivation to get you back on track but you're not sure where exactly you need the push. That's actually a good reason to hire a coach. Or, say, you have numerous needs and you're not sure what should come first, second, and third, that's another good reason to get a coach. A good coach will help you get your priorities straight quickly and get you into action just as quickly.
The clearer you are about what you need, the easier it will be when you perform research to find the perfect coach. For example, in the first situation - feeling stuck - you'll want to find a coach who is skilled at motivation, project management, and/or execution. In the second example, you will probably want a coach whose focus is on organization, life balance, and/or time (or life) management.
2 Doing the research. There are several methods of research you should employ to find the right coach. There are coach directories that you can search for a coach by location or specialty. The following web sites provide such a service - coachinc.com or coachfederation.com. You may also perform a general search on, say, Google by putting in key words such as Life Coach Boston, or Life Coach Transitions, or Executive Coach Leadership.
Another method of searching is by calling those in your network who have experienced coaching. You won't necessarily want to hire their coach, even if they were amazed by them, but you may want to speak with that coach to find out 1) if they specialize in what you're looking for, or 2) if they can recommend someone who does coach this specialty.
You should, at a minimum, talk to three coaches to gain perspective. You will find that each coach has her or his particular way of approaching client needs and helping them succeed in their endeavor.
3 Make a list of questions. Start your list by including virtually everything that comes to mind and then go back and organize them by theme. Question topics should include: Price, Length of commitment, Manner of Delivery (phone, in-person, Skype, etc.), Expectations of the coach, what Coaching Process or Procedure is to be followed, and how to know when it's time to end the relationship.
4 Conducting the interview. More than likely, your initial coach interview/conversation will take place on the phone. At this point, it is especially important to be prepared. Many times a coach will not be immediately reachable by phone because he or she will be busy coaching other people, so it's likely you will be receiving a call back from the coach. Many coaches offer a free introductory call (30 to 60 minutes), and the coach may offer you to jump in right now and be coached when he or she calls.
What you want to know (to be asked before, during, or after the session):
- Ask the coach what his or her coaching style or method is. Are they directive, supportive, inquiring, exploring, guiding, assertive, informative, etc.?
- Ask the coach what her or his areas of specialty are. In other words, ask them to identify their strengths.
- Ask the coach how long they have been coaching.
- Ask the coach what kind of results you can expect from the relationship.
- Ask the coach to identify their typical (or ideal) client.
- Ask the coach to describe what should happen if you feel the coaching isn't working and you feel the need to end the relationship after the first few sessions (or at any time during the relationship).
- Ask the coach where he or she learned how to be a coach and why they chose that organization.
- Ask the coach - "What do I most need to know about you and your coaching before we begin?"
Your interview (or coaching session) should be a dance - sometimes the coach will lead and other times you will. If one party is continually leading the conversation, it's the wrong coach. There will be times in a coaching relationship where one person will dominate the session because it is necessary. During an introductory session, however, if either party is talking too much, it is a sign of imbalance. Take heed and look elsewhere. An imbalanced conversation doesn't mean the coach is not good, it just means you and the coach are not a good fit.
Also, the coach's demeanor should be a good combination of serious and light-hearted. There should be an easy flow to things. Pay attention if the coach begins to preach or lecture. If they do this now, it's possible they will do it even more in future coaching sessions. We all need guidance, and sometimes even a stern warning that we're about to crash into a wall, but coaching should be always about balance - a healthy dose of light-heartedness and seriousness so that you're not exhausted at the end of the session.
5 Know the coach's style or method of coaching. You have already asked the coach the question about their style of coaching, now put it to the test. If they say they are more directive in nature, for example, ask them to show you how that would work in your situation. There is one key point to remember for all future coaching sessions - you are always in charge. That means, you should always be granted the right to say "No." If you're uncomfortable with a request that a coach makes, do not go forward. Express your feelings and move on. If the coach gives you a hard time, stand your ground - you are in charge.
6 Don't buy immediately. Even if the coach sounds like the perfect fit, finish your interviews. If this was your last interview call, wait a day. Give yourself the time and space to let logic catch up with emotion. Choosing a coach is a big deal. After all, it's your hard-earned cash that's being paid out for the service. Make sure you're going to get your money's worth.
After each coaching interview or complimentary session, take a few moments to review your thoughts and feelings. Use the below scorecard to evaluate the session and your perceptions:
Score 1 - 10
(1 = lowest, 10 = highest)
Professionalism ___
Competence ___
Confidence Level ___
Experience ___
Knowledge ___
Perceptivity ___
Ease of Coaching ___
Evidence of Balance ___
Ability to Dance ___
Likeability ___
Comfort Level ___
Pay attention to the areas that you scored the coach lowest in. Is that score going to be acceptable to you in the coming weeks if you choose this person as your coach?
7 The first "official" paid coaching session. Use this session to set a timetable. Aim for a completion date. Don't let conversations wander. Stay on point. If your newly hired coach does not do her or his part in guiding and managing the conversation and time, it may be a signal that they're not right for you. You want to make every session "count." You want to come away from every session feeling like you would after a session with a personal trainer - that you've accomplished something, that you've performed some hard work but you enjoyed the process, and that you are working towards a meaningful goal.
Lastly, coaching is a process. There will be sessions when you will feel euphoric, and there will be the occasional session when you will feel less than enthusiastic. Typically, you should consistently feel energized, upbeat, committed, and inspired by your sessions. You're not paying your coach to entertain you, nor are you paying him or her to be your parent. You should consistently expect respect, support, and acknowledgment from your coach. Occasionally, you may need a stern reminder, or even a warning that your behavior is not serving you. A good coach will never step over the obvious; she or he should skillfully confront you in all situations that require it. In other words, your coach should always tell you the truth, even when you don't want to hear it.
In every case, coaching should be an enjoyable, rewarding experience. Go into your coaching relationship with this as an expectation, and don't let go of it throughout the relationship.
To the uninitiated, there are a few things you need to know before you hire a coach. It's called "kicking the tires" in the auto industry; you want to see if the coach really is who she (or he) says she (or he) is. In my experience, I have seen not-so-good coaches with great marketing material (web site, face book, etc.) and great coaches who prefer less fanfare. In other words, there is no rhyme or reason how coaches will market themselves, so it's ultimately up to the buyer (you) to find and discern who is right for you.
The following steps will help you prepare to find and hire the perfect coach for you:
1 Know why you want to work with a coach. Sometimes, you may feel stuck; you might be feeling that you need some outside motivation to get you back on track but you're not sure where exactly you need the push. That's actually a good reason to hire a coach. Or, say, you have numerous needs and you're not sure what should come first, second, and third, that's another good reason to get a coach. A good coach will help you get your priorities straight quickly and get you into action just as quickly.
The clearer you are about what you need, the easier it will be when you perform research to find the perfect coach. For example, in the first situation - feeling stuck - you'll want to find a coach who is skilled at motivation, project management, and/or execution. In the second example, you will probably want a coach whose focus is on organization, life balance, and/or time (or life) management.
2 Doing the research. There are several methods of research you should employ to find the right coach. There are coach directories that you can search for a coach by location or specialty. The following web sites provide such a service - coachinc.com or coachfederation.com. You may also perform a general search on, say, Google by putting in key words such as Life Coach Boston, or Life Coach Transitions, or Executive Coach Leadership.
Another method of searching is by calling those in your network who have experienced coaching. You won't necessarily want to hire their coach, even if they were amazed by them, but you may want to speak with that coach to find out 1) if they specialize in what you're looking for, or 2) if they can recommend someone who does coach this specialty.
You should, at a minimum, talk to three coaches to gain perspective. You will find that each coach has her or his particular way of approaching client needs and helping them succeed in their endeavor.
3 Make a list of questions. Start your list by including virtually everything that comes to mind and then go back and organize them by theme. Question topics should include: Price, Length of commitment, Manner of Delivery (phone, in-person, Skype, etc.), Expectations of the coach, what Coaching Process or Procedure is to be followed, and how to know when it's time to end the relationship.
4 Conducting the interview. More than likely, your initial coach interview/conversation will take place on the phone. At this point, it is especially important to be prepared. Many times a coach will not be immediately reachable by phone because he or she will be busy coaching other people, so it's likely you will be receiving a call back from the coach. Many coaches offer a free introductory call (30 to 60 minutes), and the coach may offer you to jump in right now and be coached when he or she calls.
What you want to know (to be asked before, during, or after the session):
- Ask the coach what his or her coaching style or method is. Are they directive, supportive, inquiring, exploring, guiding, assertive, informative, etc.?
- Ask the coach what her or his areas of specialty are. In other words, ask them to identify their strengths.
- Ask the coach how long they have been coaching.
- Ask the coach what kind of results you can expect from the relationship.
- Ask the coach to identify their typical (or ideal) client.
- Ask the coach to describe what should happen if you feel the coaching isn't working and you feel the need to end the relationship after the first few sessions (or at any time during the relationship).
- Ask the coach where he or she learned how to be a coach and why they chose that organization.
- Ask the coach - "What do I most need to know about you and your coaching before we begin?"
Your interview (or coaching session) should be a dance - sometimes the coach will lead and other times you will. If one party is continually leading the conversation, it's the wrong coach. There will be times in a coaching relationship where one person will dominate the session because it is necessary. During an introductory session, however, if either party is talking too much, it is a sign of imbalance. Take heed and look elsewhere. An imbalanced conversation doesn't mean the coach is not good, it just means you and the coach are not a good fit.
Also, the coach's demeanor should be a good combination of serious and light-hearted. There should be an easy flow to things. Pay attention if the coach begins to preach or lecture. If they do this now, it's possible they will do it even more in future coaching sessions. We all need guidance, and sometimes even a stern warning that we're about to crash into a wall, but coaching should be always about balance - a healthy dose of light-heartedness and seriousness so that you're not exhausted at the end of the session.
5 Know the coach's style or method of coaching. You have already asked the coach the question about their style of coaching, now put it to the test. If they say they are more directive in nature, for example, ask them to show you how that would work in your situation. There is one key point to remember for all future coaching sessions - you are always in charge. That means, you should always be granted the right to say "No." If you're uncomfortable with a request that a coach makes, do not go forward. Express your feelings and move on. If the coach gives you a hard time, stand your ground - you are in charge.
6 Don't buy immediately. Even if the coach sounds like the perfect fit, finish your interviews. If this was your last interview call, wait a day. Give yourself the time and space to let logic catch up with emotion. Choosing a coach is a big deal. After all, it's your hard-earned cash that's being paid out for the service. Make sure you're going to get your money's worth.
After each coaching interview or complimentary session, take a few moments to review your thoughts and feelings. Use the below scorecard to evaluate the session and your perceptions:
Score 1 - 10
(1 = lowest, 10 = highest)
Professionalism ___
Competence ___
Confidence Level ___
Experience ___
Knowledge ___
Perceptivity ___
Ease of Coaching ___
Evidence of Balance ___
Ability to Dance ___
Likeability ___
Comfort Level ___
Pay attention to the areas that you scored the coach lowest in. Is that score going to be acceptable to you in the coming weeks if you choose this person as your coach?
7 The first "official" paid coaching session. Use this session to set a timetable. Aim for a completion date. Don't let conversations wander. Stay on point. If your newly hired coach does not do her or his part in guiding and managing the conversation and time, it may be a signal that they're not right for you. You want to make every session "count." You want to come away from every session feeling like you would after a session with a personal trainer - that you've accomplished something, that you've performed some hard work but you enjoyed the process, and that you are working towards a meaningful goal.
Lastly, coaching is a process. There will be sessions when you will feel euphoric, and there will be the occasional session when you will feel less than enthusiastic. Typically, you should consistently feel energized, upbeat, committed, and inspired by your sessions. You're not paying your coach to entertain you, nor are you paying him or her to be your parent. You should consistently expect respect, support, and acknowledgment from your coach. Occasionally, you may need a stern reminder, or even a warning that your behavior is not serving you. A good coach will never step over the obvious; she or he should skillfully confront you in all situations that require it. In other words, your coach should always tell you the truth, even when you don't want to hear it.
In every case, coaching should be an enjoyable, rewarding experience. Go into your coaching relationship with this as an expectation, and don't let go of it throughout the relationship.
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